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Your Nonprofit Doesn’t Need an Opinion on Everything

Writer's picture: Patrick KirbyPatrick Kirby

Look, I get it. I’m in the trenches with clients and organizations every single day.

 

From disability inclusion to food scarcity issues, to human trafficking and LGBTQ rights, I’m on calls, meetings and discussions, literally, every hour.

 

The flurry of executive orders, policy shifts, and breaking news notifications is enough to make anyone’s head spin. And if you work at a nonprofit, you probably feel like it’s your moral obligation to chime in, take a stand, and draft yet another statement for your email list and social media.

 

But let’s pump the brakes for a second.

 

Marcus Aurelius—the original “calm down, bruh” philosopher—once said, “You don’t have to have an opinion about things.”

 

Now, was he talking about nonprofit leaders navigating the chaotic whirlwind of political decisions?


Probably not.


But should we take his advice?

 

Absolutely.

 

There’s an interesting sentiment, and I’ll go so far as saying there is a borderline dangerous belief circulating in nonprofit influencer circles, that if you don’t immediately issue a statement, post a strongly worded tweet, or light your logo up in the latest color of solidarity, you’re somehow failing as an advocate.

 

That’s nonsense.

 

Not every battle is yours to fight.

 

And if you try to carry the weight of every single political and social shift on your shoulders, you’ll collapse before the real fight even begins.

 

And that? That helps no one.

 

Also? I know why you feel as if you need to be involved.

 

Because you care so goddamn much about this sector, this industry and these individuals who we feel are being left behind or purposefully driven out of the public discourse.

 

You are empathetic


You are kind.


You are curious.


You are a team player.

 

But you’re also human. And that means you have a limit on the amount of bandwidth, agency and concern to give to others.

 

I love that you love those that are in the trenches. It makes you a good person.

 

But we need your sanity, clarity and resolve to make the nonprofit mission you have kick ass beyond what it’s doing now, and feeling obligated to take up arms on a multi-front battle spreads us too thin.

 

The Exhaustion of Constant Advocacy


Advocacy is crucial. We know this.

 

The work nonprofits do is political in many ways—because it involves people, systems, and policies.

 

Our work, as I’ve shouted from the rooftops for two decades, exists to fill the gaps of what the government can’t or refuses to do.

 

But here’s the problem: the endless cycle of reacting to every single governmental decision, every shift in public sentiment, and every viral outrage drains the exact emotional and physical energy you need to actually fulfill your mission.

 

And guess what? Your mission is what makes a tangible difference.

 

Every press release you agonize over? That’s time not spent running your program.

Every social media debate you wade into? That’s energy not spent helping the people who need you.

Every sleepless night wondering if you’ve said enough? That’s exhaustion that could’ve been saved for the work that actually moves the needle.

 

I’m not saying don’t care. I’m not saying don’t act. But I am saying that a well-placed, well-timed action beats knee-jerk reaction any day of the week.

 

Also, this type of additional advocacy most likely falls outside of your mission or organization. Sure, they may be nonprofit-adjacent, but you have clients and communities that rely on your full attention every day.

 

The Balance Between Allyship and Actual Work


Now, before anyone clutches their pearls, let’s be clear: I’m not saying you shouldn’t speak up for what’s right. Being an ally, a helper, and a fighter doesn’t mean you have to have a hot take on every issue the moment it drops.

 

Real advocacy isn’t performative. It’s strategic.

 

Think of it this way: You wouldn’t tell your major donors about every minor budget decision you make, right? Because it’s exhausting, dilutes your message, and makes the actual big asks less impactful. The same principle applies here.

 

When you raise your voice, it should be because:

 

·       It directly affects the work you do.


·       It’s something your audience and supporters expect and need to hear from you on.


·       You’re prepared to take meaningful action beyond words.

 

If it doesn’t check those boxes? Maybe it’s okay to sit this one out.

 

For example, I am a massive advocate and ally within the developmental disability and delay community. And in North Dakota, where I call home, the Human Services arena is one of the largest parts of the state budget and focus every biennium when the Legislature gets together.

 

For decades, the DD community has fought for community-based services – where more localized care near family and those who know individuals best, is the greatest way to give the gift of independence individuals who face a disability or are on the various spectrums.

 

Our state was THE LEADER in breaking institutionalization in this country.

 

And now there is discussion about bringing back state facilities to house individuals indefinitely and roll back nearly 50 years of progress to give all humans the opportunity to live, work and thrive outside the walls of a state hospital.

 

That fight demands our full attention

 

At the same time, our Legislature decided to write a Concurrent resolution asking the Supreme Court to reconsider gay marriage.

 

It’s ass-backwards.

 

And for some reason there are a bunch of humans we elected that are still concerned that two dudes kissing will somehow invalidate their own loveless & sexless marriages…or that their pastor who wears $900 tennis shoes and has only read 4 lines in Leviticus said so.

 

Fun Fact. No concurrent resolution at a state level has EVER changed the highest law in the land. But hey, glad you could go back to your constituents and say you tried to “vote the gay away.” Good job on the most performative vote and waste of time when we have a trafficking, homelessness, and basic needs access crisis.

 

So, everyone in our community hates both of these things.

 

And yet, those fighting for disability rights can easily get caught up in the whirlwind of inflamed outrage, and that’s when our eyes move from the critical momentum stopping the REinstitutionalization of our kids and young adults, back into spaces where we fought so hard to stop state-authorized doctors from handcuffing kids with autism to radiators.

 

So what does this actually look like?

If you’re feeling overwhelmed and torn between “doing the right thing” and “not burning yourself out,” here’s a quick gut-check process:

 

1.      Does this policy, decision, or event directly impact my mission?

 

Yes? Then it’s worth assessing your role.

 

No? Then it might be better to stay focused on what does.

 

2.      Do I have the capacity to take meaningful action on this?

 

Yes? Great. Engage strategically.

 

No? Then acknowledge it privately, support those who do have the bandwidth, and keep moving forward.

 

3.      Will speaking up lead to action, or just add to the noise?

 

Action? Go for it.

 

Noise? Maybe take a deep breath and redirect that energy.

 

Now, I want to recognize after all of this...it still may have a bit of residual guilt about not being a helper.


Let me try and give you something to say to yourself in the mirror when it feels overwhelming or awful about not being everywhere and everything to everyone:

 

You’re Not Letting People Down—You’re Keeping the Lights On

 

Let’s face it: burnout is real, and it’s one of the biggest threats to nonprofit sustainability.

 

You can’t help anyone if you’re too exhausted to function.

 

The nonprofit world has a chronic case of martyr syndrome—the belief that if you’re not running yourself into the ground for the cause, you’re not doing enough. But you can’t be an ally, advocate, or changemaker if you’re running on fumes.

 

So give yourself permission to pick your battles. Not every hill is your hill to die on.

 

The best way to fight the good fight? Make sure you have the energy, focus, and resources to be there when it really matters.

 

And if anyone questions your silence? Just hit them with the Marcus Aurelius quote and get back to work.

 

Your mission isn’t to be loud. Your mission is to be effective. And that’s exactly what you’re doing.

 

You mission, and those it directly impacts for the better, are counting on you.

 

You got this.

 

-Patrick

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