Hey, good to see you.
Why don’t you take a seat and get comfortable while you tell me a little bit about why you’re here today.
Hmmmm.
Uh huh.
Oh, you’re experiencing a bit of resistance from your organization on your ideas to grow and change and pivot during this chaotic time in the nonprofit realm?
Tell me more about that.
Interesting.
/scribbles notes on yellow pad of paper
Because what it sounds like to me is that you’re experiencing a bit of organization generational trauma.
I know. Sounds scary.
But don’t worry. I’ve seen it before.
And no. Not sure you need any prescription drugs…yet.
But holy crap, we have some work to do.
When we think about generational trauma, we usually picture it as something deeply personal — like family patterns of behavior passed down through decades of unspoken rules and emotional landmines.
But what if I told you that nonprofits can have generational trauma too?
Stay with me here — because I promise this makes sense.
It’s that stubborn mindset of “We’ve always done it that way” that’s passed down from one leadership team to the next, one board chair to the next, one volunteer cohort to the next.
And it’s killing your ability to change, grow, and — you guessed it — fundraise.
Nonprofits are notorious for being resistant to change. Why? Because change means risk, and risk means failure, and failure is the nonprofit boogeyman hiding under every strategic planning session or conversation about where to go as an organization.
We fear that shaking things up might alienate long-time donors or make us look like we don’t know what we’re doing (newsflash: no one knows what they're doing, and that’s okay).
So we stick with the same events, the same board structure, the same messaging that worked in 1998 because that one donor from the all-you-can-eat pancake breakfast still thinks it’s a great idea.
And it’s not just the big, obvious stuff. Generational organizational trauma seeps into the tiniest cracks of how we operate.
It’s in the way we handle volunteer appreciation (same old potluck, same old plaque and appreciation note, and same old list of churches we ask to show up every year).
It’s in our board meetings (where someone inevitably brings up the spaghetti dinner from 2004 as the gold standard of fundraising).
It’s in our language — “we’re just a small nonprofit."
It's in our mindset — “we can’t afford to take risks.”
It’s exhausting.
It’s outdated.
It’s time to cut the cord.
Need a checklist to self-diagnose to tell if you’re stuck in this cycle? I got you. Here are some telltale signs of The Symptoms of Generational Organization Trauma
Resistance to New Ideas: You suggest a bold, or just new, fundraising idea or marketing campaign, and the response is, “We tried that once back in 2003, and it didn’t work.” Or even worse: “That’s not how we do things around here.”
Well of course it’s not how you do things. That’s why you hit your ceiling of funding 13 years ago. And of course it didn’t work. Dale didn’t like it out of the gate and sabotaged the whole thing by gatekeeping folks who would have been perfect to attend that event, but he was butt-hurt that no one listened to his idea of having a spaghetti feed like the Lions Club had the week prior “’cause it raised a lot of money.’”
Fear of Alienating Long-Time Supporters: Any hint of change gets squashed because it might (maybe, possibly, but more than likely, clearly) upset that one legacy donor who’s been giving $100 a year since the Nixon administration.
First of all, that guy still writes checks, and no one has talked to him in 23 years. So, no, you don’t have any clue to how he feels about tweaking an event he’s never been to or launch a program that he’s never shown interest in.
Defending Tradition Over Impact: You’re clinging to an annual event that costs more than it brings in because, well, tradition.
My God man, that Donut Bingo Event raising $313 every year isn’t making the impact you think it is. In fact, the 28 hours of work that goes into it and the amount of volunteers it takes to get Gladys to show up and participate actually COST you $2,000. How you can run a program with negative $1,700 is beyond me.
Volunteers Stuck in Their Ways: Your long-time volunteers dismiss new ideas from younger or newer members because “they just don’t understand how things work.”
Yes I do. Everyone does. But, you’ve let the monkeys run the zoo for 20 years, so I can see how terrifying it would be to go into the enclosure.
Avoiding Conflict: You know a change needs to happen, but addressing it would mean confronting someone who’s been there forever — and that’s uncomfortable.
We want desperately to be everyone’s friend, and having any bit of negative talk about the organization might just send you over the edge.
If any of these sound familiar, congratulations — your nonprofit is haunted by the ghosts of campaigns past.
So, why do we do this to ourselves?
Generational organizational trauma thrives on comfort and fear.
Comfort because it’s easier to keep doing what we know, and fear because it means risking failure or angering those long-time-supporters or leaders who feel like they’ve earned a say in every decision.
But here’s the truth: clinging to tradition for tradition’s sake is a surefire way to stay mediocre.
Donors expect innovation.
Communities evolve.
Even your mission needs to be re-examined once in a while to make sure it’s not just lip service to some outdated idea of what you should be doing.
Plus, those legacy donors? They don’t always hate change — but they do hate being left out of the conversation. The same people who cling to the past are often the ones most proud to see the organization grow — if you bring them along for the ride and help them see how their legacy is being honored even while evolving.
How to Break the Cycle (IT'S THERAPY TODAY! HOORAY!)
Breaking free from generational organizational trauma isn’t just about doing things differently — it’s about changing how you think. Here’s how:
Acknowledge the Trauma: Just like any other kind of trauma, the first step is admitting it’s there. Call it out in a board meeting or leadership retreat. Point out where you see that stuck-in-the-past thinking and put words to the fear behind it.
Fun fact: There are so many people on your board, inside your nonprofit, or around the community that have the same thought. Be brave enough to say it, and you’ll immediately hear “Oh thank God you said something…I’ve been thinking about that forever…”
Honor the Past Without Getting Stuck in It: Acknowledge that the traditions were important — that they brought success and built the foundation you’re standing on. But make it clear that honoring doesn’t mean replicating forever.
In fact, you’re not honoring how you got there by standing still. You honor those that came before you and fought for this growth…by growing and impacting more!
Involve Your Stalwarts in Change: Long-time supporters and volunteers can become your best advocates if you involve them early in the change process. Don’t just present change as a decision already made — ask for input and frame it as an evolution rather than a rejection of their hard work.
I’m big on asking for perspective and advice. It’s an easy way to have a conversation and an even easier way to get buy in if those who are already cheerleaders of your nonprofit get a chance to help along the way!
Celebrate the Risk: Make risk-taking part of your organization’s DNA. Celebrate it. Share stories of when risks paid off (or didn’t) and what you learned. Normalize trying new things without fear of judgment.
I’m a big fan of bragging about how terrible something was, and how you triumphed. Ask yourself, “what’s the worst thing that could happen?” I promise your brain will make up WAY more than what actually will occur.
Don’t Let the Past Hold Your Future Hostage: Your mission didn’t peak in 2002 like the band Five for Fighting. Your story isn’t over. Sometimes shaking things up is the best way to prove that your organization still has a pulse.
Don’t keep your nonprofit living in the era of giant CD cases hoarded under the seat of your PT Cruiser. You can stream things now.
Seriously. I’m convinced that generational organizational trauma is real, and it’s holding your nonprofit back from being as bold, creative, and impactful as it could be. The good news is that breaking free doesn’t mean disrespecting the past — it means respecting your mission enough to move forward.
Stop saying “We’ve always done it that way” like it’s a badge of honor.
In fact, make it so you want to actually vomit when you hear that phrase.
Instead, ask, “What’s next?” Your mission deserves that level of curiosity and courage. Your community deserves a nonprofit that’s growing, evolving, and pushing boundaries.
How exciting is it to ask that question!? And involve your board, community and supporters that too?
Let’s stop letting tradition be the bad guy in your story. Instead, make it the foundation on which we build something even better.
It’s time to break the cycle, take a breath, and move forward — without dragging the ghosts of pancake breakfasts past with us.
Now, that will be $500.
Shall I bill your insurance?
You got this!
-Dr. Patrick
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